Chez Shaffner

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

A Much Needed Injection of Football: Part Two

Yesterday I warned you to expect another football article, this one tackling the Ole Miss vs. Missouri show-down on Saturday. Well, better a day late than never at all…

We had big plans for our Saturday. The sun was shining, it was rumored the air temperature would touch eighty by mid-afternoon, and the swimming pool in my building remained open for business (two more weeks before they mark the official end of summer). Therefore, lounging on lawn chairs while listening to our iPods in preparation for the Ben Harper concert later that night was definitely in play.

So was shopping. Keryn has some struggles finding shoes in her size (5½) and I proposed a trip across town to the DSW in Downtown Crossing. (Because that’s the kind of new age, sensitive guy I am).

Finally, there was the issue of food. In fact, we were five steps from the door, en route to our old standby, The Trident (which I have written about before and will surely write about again), when Keryn decided to check her email one last time. We were expecting a message from an out-of-town friend about whether she’d be able to meet up with us later that night.

"What’s FSN?" she asked.

"Fox Sports Net," I said. "Why?"

"Do you get that station?"

"Of course," I said.

She looked at me with her big brown eyes; I readied myself for a bomb. But how many megatons could she drop on me, if FSN was involved? Dance team competitions and the like seem much more ESPN2.

"The Ole Miss game is on," she said.

"Okay," I said.

"We might have to watch it." She winced, as if she were asking me to scrub the toilet bowl.

I pretended to be hurt, conflicted by the Sophie’s Choice she was presenting me. Gee, watch football or shop for shoes? Faux-reluctantly, I agreed. (Because that’s the kind of new age, sensitive guy I am.)

Two days in a row with football? Two days in a row with football, at my girlfriend’s request? I almost couldn’t contain myself. But I had to act unenthused.

"Sure, I guess that’s okay," I said, flatly, before lumbering over to take the choice seat on the couch and grabbing the remote. "But since we don’t have any food in the house, I suppose we’ll have to order pizza..."

(By the way, Mizzou manhandled Ole Miss, 34-7. It wasn’t pretty.)

From now on I’ll be looking to find when they are televised again, so I can "accidentally" leave the page open on my computer for her to see...

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